Right, let’s talk about anger. Because if you’ve ever screamed into a pillow, punched a wall, or fantasised about chucking your laptop out the window, you’re probably doing it wrong. Sorry.
We’ve all been fed this idea that anger needs to be “let out.” Get it off your chest. Have a good rant. Smash some plates in a rage room and you’ll feel better. Except you won’t. And the science backs this up in a way that’s both reassuring and slightly annoying if you’ve already paid for said rage room.
The Venting Myth Needs to Die
A massive study published in Nature this year looked at how different strategies affect our anger levels[1]. Turns out, all that venting you’ve been doing? It’s probably making things worse. When you physically act out your anger while thinking about whatever (or whoever) pissed you off, you’re not releasing it. You’re rehearsing it. You’re teaching your brain that this is how we handle things. Great.
The research is pretty clear: punching bags, screaming, “letting it all out” doesn’t help[3][10]. In fact, it tends to increase aggression rather than reduce it. Which makes sense when you think about it. You’re basically practising being angrier.
What Does Actually Work Then?
Here’s where it gets interesting. The same studies found that people who manage anger well aren’t suppressing it or pretending it doesn’t exist. They’re doing two main things: accepting it and reframing it[1].
Acceptance sounds soft, but it’s not. It’s just noticing “I’m angry right now” without immediately acting on it or beating yourself up about it. You feel what you feel. Fine. What you do next is what matters.
Reframing is about looking at the situation differently. Not in some toxic positivity way, but actually questioning whether your interpretation is the only one going. Did your colleague *deliberately* undermine you, or are they just stressed and rubbish at communication? Both might be true, but only one keeps you angry.
Mindfulness Isn’t Bullshit (Unfortunately for Me)
Look, I know. Another thing telling you to be mindful. But a meta-analysis covering 118 studies found that people who score high on mindfulness measures consistently show lower anger and aggression[3]. And before you say “well, they’re probably just calm people anyway,” the research shows mindfulness can be trained. It’s not a personality trait you’re born with or without.
What mindfulness does is create a gap between feeling angry and reacting to it. That’s it. Just enough space to choose what happens next instead of your anger choosing for you.
The studies show this works across age groups, genders, and whether you’ve got clinical anger issues or you’re just a bit hot-headed sometimes[3]. Deep breathing, meditation, just noticing what’s happening in your body when anger kicks in. None of it is sexy or dramatic, which is probably why rage rooms are more popular.
The Workplace Stuff
Recent research on daily workplace anger found something interesting. It’s not about whether you get angry at work (you will, because jobs are often annoying). It’s about what you do with it[9]. People who use constructive approaches like problem solving or actually communicating have better work relationships and get more done. People who suppress it or avoid it end up in more interpersonal conflict. Shocker.
What the Experts Are Saying
Dr. Ryan Martin, who studies anger professionally (imagine that job title), talks about how our childhood experiences shape how we handle anger as adults[4]. Dr. Howard Kassinove goes further, explaining the difference between healthy and unhealthy anger, and why all those “primal scream” approaches are counterproductive[10][16].
The Harvard Medicine Magazine recently covered how researchers are trying to understand anger as a spectrum rather than a disorder[5]. Which makes sense. Anger itself isn’t the problem. It’s what we do with it, how often it shows up, and whether it’s running our lives.
The Bottom Line
None of this is about never getting angry. You’re going to lose your head sometimes. That’s the deal with being human. But the idea that you need to physically express anger to get rid of it? That’s nonsense.
The evidence points to mindfulness, cognitive reappraisal, relaxation training, and actually learning to communicate better[1][3][8][12]. Less dramatic than a rage room, but also less likely to leave you feeling like an idiot afterwards.
Anger’s there for a reason. It’s information. It’s telling you something matters to you, or something’s not right. Listen to it, then decide what to do with it. That’s the skill. Not pretending it doesn’t exist, not letting it run the show, just… dealing with it like the adult you’re supposed to be.
And if you’ve already booked that rage room? Go smash some stuff. Just don’t expect it to fix anything.
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References
[1] Nature (2025). Meta-analysis on emotion regulation strategies and anger.
[2] Anger Secrets podcast, hosted by Alastair Duhs.
[3] Meta-analysis covering 118 studies on mindfulness and anger reduction (2025).
[4] Anger Professor podcast/interview with Dr. Ryan Martin.
[5] Harvard Medicine Magazine: Science-backed overview of anger management.
[6] Distressed to Joyful; Bailey’s Way podcast.
[8] Research on mindfulness, relaxation training and anger management.
[9] Studies on daily workplace anger and coping strategies.
[10] Speaking of Psychology (APA) with Dr. Howard Kassinove.
[12] Research on anger management programs, problem-solving and communication skills.
[16] APA podcast content on healthy vs unhealthy anger.
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